Organ Studios on Clement Street is selling something that might lessen
man’s insecurity. It’s an organ called the Chamberlain Music Master,
which includes a button that delivers, via tape, a round of applause
“of concert-hall size.” You play “Chop-sticks,” press the
applause button and bask in the distant patter of 2000 paws. Think what
this does for the ego.
—San Francisco Chronicle
company in an English city is planning a service known as MOR (for
Morale). When Dad goes off to work in a huff or forgets a birthday or
yells at the kids, Mom can run to the phone, dial MOR and hear a
soothing male voice coo: “You’re quite, quite beautiful, you
—Alton, III., Telegraph
Gardenia And Feel Important
magazine once told of a sidewalk flower vendor who was doing very little
business. Suddenly a happy thought struck him, and he put up this sign:
“Buy a gardenia; it will make you feel important all day long!”
Almost immediately his sales began to increase. People love to feel
inflated, for their innermost nature thrives on any attention that
caters to their pride.
Capitalizing On John Smiths
John Smith is
still the most common name in this country. It was for that reason that
Mark Twain dedicated his story of The Celebrated Jumping Frog to
John Smith, “who I have known in diverse and sundry places and whose
many and manifold virtues did always command my esteem.”
that anyone to whom a book is dedicated would be sure to buy at least
one copy, and since there were thousands of John Smiths, his book would
be assured of at least a modest sale.
—Bits & Pieces
A Black Heart?
Sam Jones, the
great white evangelist, on one occasion preached a sermon to an immense
concourse of colored people. After he had finished a stout, old colored
woman waddled up to him, seized his hand, and pumped it up and down
vigorously. “Gawd bless you Brudder Jones! You is everybody’s
preacher, black as well as white! You may have a white skin, Brudder,
but you sho got a black heart!”
Pastor Watches Own Funeral
Lauderdale, Florida (AP)—The Rev. Ivory W. Mizell commemorated his
64th birthday by watching his own funeral. “I think it was good. It
was much better than I expected,” he said after Wednesday night’s
service at the First Baptist Church of Piney Grove.
programs printed up for the service were these words: “This, my
funeral service, is being held because I have no pleasure in words I
cannot hear, flowers I cannot smell and friends I cannot see.”
Showing Friendship Now In Funeral
A man of 69 in
a small town in Fukuoka Prefecture in Japan invited about 20 business
friends to his home and held his “funeral.” Ritually, it was a
full-dress funeral, complete with funeral sutrachanting by two Buddhist
priests. He even held the customary rites for the seventh day after his
What was his
idea? Marutaka Kogane, director of the local soft drink dealers’
association, explained: “If my friends have enough friendship for me
to attend my funeral when I die, I should rather they showed their
friendship now.” After the obsequies, there was an evening of revelry
with gay entertainment. The “mourners” ate, drank, and made merry.
Said the “deceased” in satisfaction: “From now on I’ll forget
myself and work for the trade and for the world.”
Epigram On Flattery
I can live for two months on a good compliment.
Praise, like gold and diamonds, owes its value only to its
Robert Montgomery’s advice concerning applause: “Enjoy it,
but never quite believe it.”
The chances are about 10 to 1 that when a man slaps you on
the back, he wants you to cough up something.
—The Bible Friend
Sigmund Freud once refused to attend a festival in his honor,
remarking, “When someone abuses me I can defend myself; against praise
I am defenseless.”
The same man cannot be both friend and flatterer.
According to Hindu law, lying is justified in only two cases: in
saving a person’s life and in paying a compliment to a lady.
Never praise a woman too highly. If you stop, she’ll think you
don’t love her any more; if you keep it up, she’ll think she’s too
good for you.
Imitation is the sincerest flattery. A girl would wear a
beautiful dress, and few days later, many would be seen wearing the same
Paul Lee, Encyclopedia of 7,700 Illustrations, (Garland,
Texas: Bible Communications, Inc.) 1996.
to "Illustrations Plus" MENU